I have a male friend that is engaged to be married and at
one point I heard stories where other women found a way to diss his fiance because
she didn’t dress a certain way or looked a certain way. They failed to realize
that all those other things can be stripped in an instant but she will still
be a great mother, have a great personality, and be the perfect complement to
him. She’s truly the woman he needs and you can see how happy he is because of
that. These other women are still the same ones in the club every weekend looking for a man not understanding how to be a woman a man needs. The wants are a great thing to look at but pay attention to the one that satisfies your needs. The one you
need is the one you see longevity, will
talk to you at 4 am when you just need to rant, or does small things to just cheer
you up. These are the ones that affect your soul and will honestly always have a place there despite the outcome.
Wrong Timing or Wrong person
I say there is no such thing as bad timing or wrong timing. I just think we meet people at certain points in our lives to teach us a lesson. Sometimes the lesson is to teach us how it feels when someone affects our soul and what it feels like to lose them. Other times its to teach us how it feels to not be appreciated. All lessons we really may need to understand to make us better people. Not everyone is mentally ready to have the love of their life forever so we have to learn some lessons.
In Endi’s, example he met his soul mate, she affected his soul, but he had to go away to school. I still call that complete bullshit. I do honestly believe we love the most purest romantically in our late teens so I truly get what he is saying but if he needed her in his world he would have made it work but all I seen were excuses. People have married their first love the difference is they never gave up. I know it wasn't a perfect journey, what love story is, but if they were the right person they overcame whatever obstacle they faced. If it is important to you then you will make a way. If it isn’t then you will make an excuse. Many make excuses that they don't have enough money, live too far, can't settle down until they accomplished set goals, too young, and so many other dumb excuses that make us feel better for not choosing to keep fighting for a person in their lives. These same excuses there are stories of those that made it work.
Compromise
I seen this picture before I actually read Endi's part. Just understanding his thought process I knew he saw one person who wanted to be on land while the other wanted to get off so it just wouldn't work. My initial perspective is completely different. This is exactly who each other needed but it required compromise to obtain it. If the person on land couldn't compromise staying on land just a few more days to give the boat person some rest wouldn't you call him a fool if he told him to leave because he didn't get his way? This is how life works sometimes we have to make sacrifices and compromise for each other. People make bad situations work because they are worth the temporary compromise to make it work. Long distance relationships turn into living together everyday.
Too Little Too Late
The sad part is people make excuses on temporary situations then when they overcome it realize they let the right person slip away. The person you take for granted is probably in someone else's prayers always remember that. You can keep making excuses to justify your actions but there will come a point when that person finds someone that appreciates what they have to offer. Not everyone can handle that lesson and sometimes you may never meet another person like that again. So be careful of taking the people you need in your life for granted. Cues Ciara "I Bet"........
Both sexes realize the repercussions of taking people for granted but as I am nearing 30 one of the most interesting things I am hearing is its harder to find a woman of substance from my male friends. There really comes a point when it will get pretty lonely to be a bachelor forever. Just certain things you did in your early 20s gets old and its nice to have someone to face the world with. Now we realize that life has no set blueprint and most things will never go as planned. I don't know one person who's life plan is still on point. Life happens. So why do we keep pushing the people we need in our lives away when we know perfection isn't achievable?
You will never be perfect. They will never be perfect. Time will never be perfect. Perfect does not exist. The person we need is worth it though. I believe we find the people we need in times of struggle so it's funny to me when a man thinks he only needs a woman when he has the career, car, money, etc. in order.Yes he should be a provider but it is so easy to love someone when it is going well but that isn't the constant reality. That's why divorce is so high because people do not know how to get through the struggle together. That person that still loves you when they do not see you all the time because you are in school or working is who you need. When they still love you when do not have money because you had to pay your bills or when you do not look your best is the person you need. You will not come across too many people like that in your lifetime so lets stop making them another lesson you had to learn the hard way. I'm not saying deviate from your goals but learn to sacrifice and compromise to make it work. Stop making excuses.
There is no such thing as wrong timing. Time is a man made construct. We are probably the only species in the entire universe that are taught to race against time. That's why aliens won't contact us because we are the idiot species that force ourselves up every morning to meet endless deadlines. Live in the now because that perfect tomorrow is not even promised.
Love now, why wait?
"People say you don't know what you got until it's gone. Truth is you knew what you had, just never thought you would lose it"
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